Tuesday, December 5th, 2006

Yesterday I got really depressed. Someone at school decided to show the entire 8th grade a movie during periods 1-3. What a stupid idea! Of course, when they came to my class during 4th period they were off the wall. One of my students decided it would be funny to bang on the outside of my door about 10 minutes after the class began. I quickly went over to the door and he ran. I grabbed his backpack to stop him. I was so frustrated that my week began that way. I lost it. Screamed my head off. Then apologized for screaming. Class sucked after that. They learned nothing. My other class that day was also dysfunctional.

Regardless of the details, it really upsets me that I get so upset. I feel unfit to be around kids when I feel that frustrated.

Today was better. I planned a really simple lesson. Introduction – notes – independent work – discussion. It was highly teacher-centered, but I’m learning that that’s what I’m going to have to do this year if I want my kids to pass the regents exam. I’ve been really fighting against this, internally. Teaching sixth grade for two years, I got used to planning elaborate, fun hands-on experiences. We were able to cover less material and go into more depth. Maybe this kind of letting go of the need to make it like last year will actually help keep me sane.

The work in the science closet is really slow going. I finished putting up some shelves today. There’s more though. And then painting. And then cleaning supplies and moving them to the new shelves… and then cleaning off the old shelves. Ugh.

I’m feeling pretty isolated at this point. I haven’t had substantial collaboration with any teachers lately.

I felt a little better today. Reviewed guided notes packet with classes. I see that the guided notes packets actually force the kids to pull information out of the textbook. It’s a format they’re used to (I’m guessing from social studies) and they readily engaged with it. Unfortunately, my textbook doesn’t have any guided notes packets or worksheets that come with it. That’s the down side. The up side is that I’ll have to create these packets, which will force me to learn the material.

I painted the wall in the science storage closet today. The custodians were supposed to do it but I could wait any longer. I bought a brush tonight and plan on finishing the job tomorrow morning. Then I’ll begin putting up the shelving (which really involves hacking 3” off the metal legs so they sit flush against the wall). Who knew custodial work could be so much fun…

We had a common prep meeting today. Teachers seem really annoyed in general. We were asked to put together another common assessment. The department head spoke about collaboration – she said that it takes time, which we don’t necessarily have. She is very realistic, which balances out the principal's demands. Mr. X vented at the meeting about how he doesn’t think it’s fair that we’re expected to meet in light of the 25 period load. He really got worked up. The department head did a good job of diffusing the situation. She explained, rationally, what our contractual obligations are and reiterated that collaboration doesn’t only happen in common prep meetings. It can be a 3 minute conversation in the hall too.

The principal emailed me this evening. He spoke with the principal of Y Academy and is arranging for me to go over there and work with their Earth Science “czar”. I’m looking forward to it.

I think this year is difficult due also to the lack of curriculum map for the year. We didn’t follow the NYS scope and sequence, and Mr. Z has been unhelpful in creating our own. Ms. W and I have been trying to plan together, but that’s too time consuming. Now that I see that common assessments can be super easy for the kids, I’m going to just start doing my own thing. I’ll create guided reading packets – guide my kids through the text. Guide them through regents questions. Give them a quiz every week and start doing labs again…

Here's a before and after picture of the science closet (aka "closet of death) in the works...

I created this blog as a place to do my journaling for the action research I'm conducting this year. I chose not to use it because a sister's friend was recently fired due to his blogging about work. That said, I'll include some of my journal entries, but I'll delete any mention of my school and people's names...